12 Ways To Calm Your Anxiety
Anxiety is an important part of life. It helps to motivate us and can keep us safe.
When your anxiety becomes difficult to manage, it is hard to find ways to calm down. Our digestion slows, our planning and rational thinking goes offline and a tremendous amount of energy is pulled into what is called the flight, fright, or freeze. It is a reflex that optimizes our survival in times of perceived threat based on the circumstances and options available to us. When we are in a constant state of anxiety that is outside our ability to manage, it is taxing to our system and it can become exhausting.
Anxiety becomes a problem when its excessive.
The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM V-TR) defines generalized anxiety disorder as excessive worry that is difficult to control and occurs more days than not for at least six months. The anxiety is specific in that it impacts important areas of life. The symptoms of Generalized Anxiety Disorder includes at least three of the following:
Restlessness or feeling keyed up or on edge
Being easily fatigued
Difficulty concentrating or mind going blank
Irritability
Muscle tension
Sleep disturbance (difficulty falling or staying asleep, or restless unsatisfying sleep)
Ways to calm the storm
An important part of supporting your system when it is in a constant state of anxiety, is to calm it, or “Down regulating”. In order to down regulate we need to be in a safe space both externally and internally. For example, it wouldn’t be appropriate to down regulate when you are in the middle of a life threatening situation. Down regulating supports your system in recognizing that you are safe to connect with your body. Alternatively, you may need to “up regulate” which is a way to express the energy in order to move it through. Sometimes it is hard to know what you need when you are triggered, that is why is important to find a skilled anxiety therapist to help you learn your own system and what responses fit best for you.
It’s common for mindfulness or meditation to seem intimating. In our busy life, it’s hard to find the time to clear our minds or to be still. But mindfulness is simply being aware of what is, even when you are in motion.
Recognizing what is happening in the present moment is the essence of mindfulness. It is possible to practice mindfulness while going through life. Mindfulness does not require all the relaxing conditions to be met.
For example, when you are in the middle of your work meeting, you may draw your awareness to how tight your shoulders or your neck are, if you are leaning forward in your chair or if you are sitting back and turned away. The awareness of your body is a way of being mindful. It allows you to become an observer of yourself without the charge of what is considered right or wrong. The reason why many therapists discuss mindfulness is because when you become curious and aware of your own process, there is room for choice.
7 Down-regulating activities
When you feel like you would like to calm down, these Down Regulating exercises may be useful to practice. Please keep in mind if anything feels like it is making you feel worse, to stop and to honor that boundary within your own system. Also make adjustments to any recommendations to accommodate your needs.
Utilizing your Five Senses- Utilize your five senses to help you orient to the here and now. Here is a tip sheet on how to do that.
The Five Senses Worksheet
Countdown to Calmness
Reminding yourself that your body is just remembering - Depending on your history, sometimes triggers can come out of no where, often a sign that your body is remembering something from the past. Naming this to yourself can help you put it into context and bring you into the present moment. You can statements such as “my body is just remembering. I am safe.”
Mindful breathing and grounding exercises- You can do this by noticing your breath without changing how you are breathing. It can be helpful to feel your feet in the ground, your back against a chair and to allow yourself to just slow down. Yoga can offer a communal space to get in touch with your breath and to feel grounded.
An example of a meditation that you can do from home:
Breathing Meditation UCLA
Taking one piece at a time, slowly- We feel overwhelmed when there are too many things all at once. Taking things one piece at a time can be helpful to slow your system down.
Finding neutral- Instead of seeking out discomfort or pleasure in our body, find areas where it feels “fine” or neutral. Sometimes this can be your hand on your lap or your feet touching the ground. This can be helpful to recognize that you are able to have a neutral experience in your body rather than a “charged” one.
For an example of a meditation you can see my YouTube video here:
Guided meditation- There are some great guided meditations out there. We each have our own particular type of meditation we respond to. One suggestion is the following guided meditation:
Meditation for Working with Difficulties | UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center
Distraction- Sometimes distraction can help in the short term when you are feeling especially overwhelmed. Maybe a movie or a show helps. Think about ways you can take a time out from your anxiety in a safe way.
5 Up-regulating activities
When the energy feels like it needs to move through and be expressed, Up regulating activities can be beneficial to practice. Finding a safe way to express your anxiety can be a useful tool. It is important to work with your system, not against it, if any of the suggestions below do not work for you, honor that boundary or make adjustments to support yourself. The intention should be one of strengthening or developing a trust in your system.
Movement- Sometimes moving our bodies helps to release some of the anxious energy we are holding. This include dancing, allowing yourself to jump, or to move however your body wants to in a safe way.
Drawing, Painting or Writing- This can be up regulating or down regulating depending on how you express yourself. Examples can be drawing a serene images or scribbling on a piece of paper, painting in wild brushstrokes or writing from different perspectives.
Exercise- Finding a class or an aerobic exercise that helps you safely move your body can help to move some of that anxious energy through. Examples of this might be going for a run, a swim, a kickboxing class or joining a group aerobic class.
Progressive Muscle Relaxation- Progressive Muscle Relaxation is an exercise that reduces stress and anxiety in your body by having you slowly tense and then relax each muscle. During this exercise each muscle should be tensed, but not to the point of strain. If you have any injuries or pain, you can skip the affected areas.
For an example of this exercise see link here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z95gPdFC7GM
Vocalizing to help express the anxiety- Sighing, grunting, singing, screaming into a pillow, or guttural laughing can all be ways to vocalize your feelings
Seeking support
Seek out support from someone you trust such as a friend or a loved one, and talk to them about your anxiety and overwhelm. Being with others in their calm can offer us calm as well.
How therapy can help
When the anxiety is affecting you in your day to day life, it can be time to reach out for support. Anxiety therapy can provide tools and expertise needed to support you in calming and finding moments of ease. For information or to find out more, set up your free initial consultation today.